Sunday, February 28, 2010

A gas pipe rupture yesterday afternoon in the SOMA of San Francisco leaves residents and business owners fumed, and traffic at a standstill.

According to a PG&E worker, The gas pipe rupture occurred around 12:30 p.m. when a private construction crew was attempting repairs on sewer lines and accidentally plowed through the gas line with a backhoe. San Francisco Police officers proceeded to shutoff a four-block area around the streets of Folsom and 11th, in addition to forcing out at least 100 residents, business owners, and customers from the area.

Traffic through Folsom and 11th Street was static,as irritated drivers looked on impatiently. The usually high traffic area of the South Market Area was now a police barricaded corral of traffic and evacuated residents. Frustrated business owners explain the shutdown destroyed the days earnings, as well as jumbled the business of their current customers. Samantha Feldman who manages Wa-Ha-Ka Restaurant, located on the corner of construction, said employees and patrons were forced to leave. Adding, the shutdown lost her at least $500 worth of business.

Another Manager Carlann lauria,who runs Crockers Lockers, said customers were pretty irate when they were forced to leave her self-storage company. After being evacuated out of the area, employees of Crockers Lockers still had to collect payment checks from customers in the zoo of people behind the police barrier. Peace was again returned to the South Market Area, when PG&E switched gas back on at 5:09 p.m.

1 comment:

  1. Put the "when" later in your lead sentence, and move up the "impact-related" stuff: A gas pipe rupture left SOMA residents and business owners fuming and brought traffic to a standstill yesterday afternoon.

    Get the capitalization right on your second sentence.

    * don't "explain" so much - just use "said"
    * day's earnings
    * Delete "Another Manager" -- just say: Carlann Lauria, who runs ...

    Overall, you need to tighten it up a bit. It's good to add a little color and description, but be careful not to bog it down.

    Avoid commentary. Delete "Fortunately by the end of the afternoon, peace was again returned to the South Market Area" -- just say when the gas was turned back on, and leave it at that.

    17/20

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